My friends and my Disbelief

“People who don’t understand are usually the ones that have a lot of things to say”.

I am agnostic and only very few people knows it not because I am afraid of being shunned and called “Anti-christ”, but because I know most people don’t understand it. Swimming against the current is never easy. Being different is very stressful. People will judge you when you do something out of the ordinary. It’s wearisome to explain something to someone who’s not ready to comprehend your thought.

I kept my disbelief in the closet except for people I know are “well educated”. I thought having college education, especially when you are majoring “Science”, will make you question everything and not relying every unexplained phenomena to supreme being,  god or magic but I guess I was wrong.

Recently, I talked to my high school friends via social apps (facebook group chat). I am aware that these particular friends are very religious because of their facebook statuses and posts and, of course, I know them. One of them is a gay, I mean homosexual. According to him, he’s been like that as long and far as he can remember and he love being himself. I have no problem with gay people, in fact I like them and I support their rights. We were exchanging messages while he’s on a “prayer meeting”, then he told me about something like “he don’t want to be gay anymore”. Of course, everyone who’s connected to that chat was shocked. I responded sarcastically with, “because it is a sin and you’ll burn in hell…hahaha”.

Homosexuality is not a sin just the act, he said. I like him and I want to make him to feel alright. So, with all of my understanding about it I told him that an act is not bad when both parties agreed and are in legal age. I thought he understands my intentions then he asked why I think that way, “Do I not fear god”? He and one of my female friends asked if I am an Atheist and bashed all wrong misguided words about Atheism to me like I am a confused and a lost soul (haha!). I didn't say anything because I know right there, they’re not ready for my thoughts. I don’t really care in everything they said except for, “How can you know if you are doing the right thing?” and “If everyone will do what they want, what do think will happen?” You see, these questions are really stupid (for people with reason) and I think I will just waste my time answering these. But I did anyway…

People will say something whether you’re doing the right or the wrong thing, might as well do what makes you happy, responsibly. Being a responsible person, one has to consider other people’s feelings and circumstances too.  A normal person will not do criminal act to another person not just because it’s against the law but because it is unpleasant thing to do. As a person, I will not kill someone not just because I am afraid to be imprisoned but because I respect the right of every human being to live.  As an Agnostic/Atheist, I do what is good and just to people not because of the reward of eternal life but because I know it’s the right thing to do. 

He insisted that knowing what is good is god, so I immediately derailed the thread. There is no point in arguing with these kinds of people. I look at them differently now but they are my friends, their faith and my disbelief will not break our relationship built for how many years of ups and downs. Surely they will look at me differently too, I just hope they will not spread the news exaggeratedly because you know… (please refer to the first paragraph)

P.S. 

I told him that since he believe that it's not right to be a homosexual and he loathes being one, then he should do something about it and end it (there are I think possible science ways). I know it is not easy but if there's a will, there's a way.

He don't hate being gay, he said. 

I think you are the confused lost soul here haha!, I replied.

I am not a lost soul, just poor in spirit, he said.

Okay, I give up!!!..haha 

(Not that I disrepect his belief but what really is funny is that he is a total-100% gay but he want to end it because it's a sin accordingly to the "Bible". He wanted to sacrifice his own happiness and self based on a fictional book.)