My forgotten CAREER SERVICE LICENSE

I am a Career Service Professional and I don't know what to do with it. Can you tell me?
Few of us have asked ourselves, other people or perhaps (if you are desperate enough) called Civil Service Commission about this.

It was summer of 2007 when my boyfriend called to inform me that I passed the CSC - PPT Exam we had last October 22, 2006. Much to my surprise, I was the last person to know about it because earlier that day, my high school teacher and classmate congratulated me for something, I just smiled (like I always do when I don't know what's going on). Well, I am proud about it not just because I am part of that 10% passers (nationwide), but also I was just a student then. In fact, I was the youngest examinee in the room.

Let me tell you one thing about the exam - it is not that easy. All those big words and numerical reasoning without the aid of dictionary and calculator, under time pressure. Hurry, hurry! It's the same feeling when I took DOST Scholarship Exam. Though some parts of me actually knew I'll gonna pass, in which I did (smiley face), still it's quite difficult, especially if you're not fond with words and numbers.

Okay, but what it is to me now? Did it make my pay grade higher? Will my employer promote me for it or will they even care? Apparently, no and I don't know. After almost eight years of working in a private Corporation, I almost forgot about it. Blah blah!!

Here in the Philippines, when we say Career Services Professional - we mean Government Employee - yes, most people I know, are under this impression - that includes me. Well, it is TRUE. In fact, when I called the CSC Public Assistance and Information Office, they validated this. Basically, this eligibility is only valid when you are planning to spend your whole career life in a Government Office - how sad! Knowing how great our government system is.

What to do about it now? NOTHING....Why? Do you want me to cry a river about it? It is just merely an additional certificate that has nothing to do with my job and what I preferred doing. Oh yeah! The darkness of my life knows no bound...

But hey! Who knows, I might end up settling in the province, teach in a government school or procrastinate in one of government offices there. (pure sarcasm)


Disappointing - yes!

Simply JESSIE...

March 11, 2014, 5:32pm.

Dear you,

Hi! I played our song again today. I've heard that you finally changed your surname to you mother's. That's good to know. I know how you really wanted it.

You know how sad it is to remember you this part of the day where you used to accompany me going home from school for three years. We were so young then yet we were so sure about life. Looking back at what we had never fails to put a smile on my face and pain in my heart - bittersweet memories.

You used to be a heart-throb then, you played soccer and you drove a motorcycle, you're tall, fair and had a really nice hair, you had dimples on your cheeks, you dressed well, kissable red lips, you laughed awkwardly cute - every high school girl's dream. Remember how you won for "Best in Talent" during Ginoong Matimatiko during your 3rd year - you danced really well. Remember when you invited me for lunch in your house and your sister told me how you like cabbage. Remember one night, when you're on top of that minibus and you saw me eating dinner, carrying my plate, in front of television. All those after school dates at the upper campus. Those moments when we cut class, went to one of friend's house, watched movies and get drunk.

I remember how our friends would say how we looked good together - a perfect match. They didn't know how stupid and childish you were and how crazier I was. I forgot how we became "us". I mean, before I met you, I already heard about you. You were this and that - really out of my league. I don't really like mestizo guys - you know that. I had some cognitive filtering then. You must have told me before how we met, still I forgot.I'm really not that romantic type.

Remember our date in the city where you bought my Savage Garden,  (and 7 other) cassette tape? Because of  "Truly, Madly, Deeply" song? We played dance arcade games - oh! and how I used to dance. That was really big a deal that time because we were just 15-year old high school studs and it was your treat (where did you get that money?). How our friends gone ballistic after knowing we went on a date after that Sunday-Church-group-date...yah..and the May 10, 2010 - Statue of Liberty, New York City deal - sorry about that, I didn't make there as well.

I was amaze how you took and loved all my craps. I know I am not as pretty as I used to see myself but you were there. How you tried to like my genre of music. How you wanted to be the guy I really wanted. How many times you cried because I was very inconsiderate. I remember how I'd let you down so many times because I used to be a "playgirl", people said. How you told me "I am not a toy mum!" (it really breaks my heart now). How could I be so cruel? How your step father wanted us apart because he is my family relative but you fought for me -  for us. How other girls secretly wanted you but you didn't leave me. How I used to be your everything. Marjorie told me she asked you how much you love me. You told her that whatever mistake I'll gonna get, as long as I still loves you, you will take me back.

I think I just miss you a little too much. You're always be part of my life, you know that. I really don't know why I'm writing this. I want to say sorry for what I have done wrong. I don't always look back for regrets, but I guess this one haunts me. If only I could go back in time, I would relive high school over and over again because you're there. It's a great time, you know.

I'm really sorry for not being there when you needed me the most. I know I am not the reason why you ended your life. But part of me can't help to wonder. If I haven't hooked up with another guy in front of you after graduation, you wouldn't be so hurt. If I didn't let you, you wouldn't be in another relationship, and another, and another. We would still be together, I could have looked over you, took care of you. But damn!!!! You're gone.

I never thought you've gone too weak. It might be my fault. You know, I kind of hate you for that. How can you be so selfish? Have you forgotten what I told you about life and pain? Or its really too much for you. Part of me dies whenever I remember you. I used to know you inside out that's why sometimes parts of me blame myself for what happened to you. I could be the one. Last time we talked -  New Year's Eve of 2009, I know you wanted to tell me something, you told me you still love me and always will. I just laughed as usual. I know then you have some health and emotional challenges yet I failed you. I was so busy talking about that guy I ditched you with - but you listened as if you're happy for me. I didn't know it's the last time I see you.

I guess sorry will not change anything now. How I can't look at your mother and sister eye to eye. How I wasn't there at your funeral. How I don't have photos of you and "us" from long ago. All I have are memories of how you  used to be.

It's funny how people still roped in our names. How your best friend, after your death, talked to me as if I AM your girlfriend. You had a serious relationship after me, they know that. But we loved each other first.

It's been two years since you've gone but everytime I played SAVAGE GARDEN tracks, you're with me again, I guess it will always be.

I miss you. See you in another time.



This is for JESSIE DENOY aka JESSIE TORRES, my friend.
You will not be forgotten.

Meat Mixins

Worried about meat leftovers?

Never occurred to me...I'm a type of person who's been through a lot. I know how it feels like if you have nothing to eat. Those challenges instilled in me...never ever to waste something with value...especially food.

Okay, enough of the drama...

Haven't I told you how I feel about Sunday morning?...I mean how the morning warms up the feeling of ease. You wake up without the alarm. You brewed your coffee without the rush. The rhythm of the old songs played on the radio..and the chance, just once a week, to cook your choice of breakfast. Oh yes! the breakfast...good thing I have leftovers...you know..how we love the Saturday Nights that we over "buy"  food for late night movie marathon or something...

Okay, I would like to share my random recipe on what's available in my kitchen. I usually do this stuff because I hate to go outside during this epic part of the day. How I just spend almost the whole day just wearing my the-night-before-clothes...I am like that most of the Sundays of my life.

Okay back to the recipe. Here it is....

I have: 

(Slice everything pea size)

5 slices of Bologna

3 slices of Ham

1/4k meat (you can have this ground)

3 pcs. Hotdog

1/4k Greenpeas

1/2k Potato

1 big green bell pepper

1 big yellow

1 cup raisin

1 medium union

4 cloves of garlic

salt and pepper

I...(since all meat ingredients are cooked)

1. Saute garlic and union, add the potato.

2. When the potato is half cooked, add green peas. Then, mix the meat ingredients cook for 3 minutes.

3. Add the remaining ingredients, add salt and pepper to taste.

4. Serve this with eggs. 

Very easy you see...

You can actually add anything here. Pineapple bits or carrots (but I didn't because I only eat raw carrots). I think you can add a lot of veggies here, like mushrooms, zucchini or brocolli, it's up to you.

Try to be creative. Be familiar to the taste of every food element so that you can make or create your own version of everything, some of them are resilient, some are not.

Anyway, I hope you'll like it. It's not some kind of scrumptious menu that are served in hotels or fine dining resto but it's a good start to be like a real independent woman who actually knows what to do with Saturday nights food leftovers...hehe! ciao!

Enchanted Kingdom Experience - Better Late than Never

March 1, 2014 - Weekend, yey!!!

 This is not really the weekend getaway we planned. We wished to visit Vigan, early this year because we've been planning it since late last year. But considering the travel time on land, wooo!!! it will only eat up half the weekend.

Okay, here we go. Lazy breakfast in a fast food restaurant, not decided where to go. Good to have my portable internet connection (if I get paid, I will tell you my provider, jk!), I can immediately check the internet for good weekend spots not too near, nor too far. Then, how about rides and fun and puke? That will be Enchanted Kingdom. Yey!!!

Upon browsing where to go first, I 've noticed that EK has their own shuttle - we will just have to go there 2 hours before the departure time which is 9:30am for guaranteed seats, which is by the way located at Centris Mall, along EDSA, PhP180 one way (quite expensive).
Then, option 2 is to go to Taft Avenue, Manila - there will be lots of buses there going to Sta. Rosa every 30minutes look for the one with Balibago signage (for tight budgets).
But I haven't found posts of bus directions and fares from Quezon City. I live in Cubao area, and I don't want to go Pasay City. I'm sure I've seen various buses operating Cubao - Laguna, etc. route, we just have to look for it, and it's Cubao, any normal businessman/bus operator would have their terminal there. Good Lord! A bus just passed by going to Balibago, and another... JAM and JAC Liner (am I high with this espresso?!)...right there, I Google Earth  the two buses name..hehe!and they are just a minute walk from where we were.

After we made up our minds, we went immediately to JAM Liner, Cubao along EDSA, paid for tickets, PhP70 only...hehe!

Wow! the travel was fast., yeah..express way it is. It only took us a little more than an hour. The bus conductor yelled (like they always do) at the passengers bound for EK to get off at Waltermart. Then, off we go...and according to the prior researches I made earlier, there will be tryke waiting at the back of the mall (tryke fare is Php10 regular and PhP36 special). Yes, there were.

This is really shameful but I'll gonna charge it to experience, anyway. You see, when we were at the mall, we bought foods - chips and pastries. That's the reason why we have to stay outside a little longer after buying the tickets because ONLY WATER is allowed inside. We ate all our food first...hehe!






FUN!!! FUN!!! FUN!!!
We rode the EKstreme Tower first, then the Space Shuttle...imagine the thrill we felt (what are we thinking!). It all seems a dream, too fast and blurry, crazy and adrenaline pumping. It's our first time and really I couldn't feel my head and it seems my heart stopped there...like I don't want to do it again..ever!









We went mellow on a Carousel and Ferris Wheel ride, then Bump Cars and a little thrill on wet and wild Log Jam. Then, watched a theater play (Pocahontas).





Of all the rides there, one can't experience it all. There were too many people and the queue rails are jam packed (well since it's a weekend, just expect it to be).

We had our dinner  and watched the fireworks display around 8:45pm. Photo-shots spree in the dark..(He needs more practice on the camera) hehe!

Then, walked up to Waltermart (because it's near, 500meter estimated). We're supposed to just wait for buses bound for Cubao at Waltermart but the good people of Laguna advised us to go to the bus terminal because there were lots of passengers that day, we might miss the last trip, and we did went to the bus terminal. Thanks to them!

After an hour and a half, we're home, pampering each others sore back and legs...still talking about the rides, the shouts, the sunburn, the unruly kids at the bump car, the experience and the happiness for doing things like this together, the first time.